


For What It's Worth

by Lidsworth



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst, Friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-18
Updated: 2014-11-02
Packaged: 2018-02-17 21:23:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2323628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lidsworth/pseuds/Lidsworth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaneki wishes he spent more time with Hide.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: IT starts out sad, but it ends on a happy note. I've always felt that Kaneki's kinda just neglected Hide, so I wanted to write a little short about him realizing this.  
> Enjoy!

He and Hinami happen to be walking on the side walk when glass and metal go flying into a crows of unsuspecting pedestrians. A car, faster than a hot bullet, tears hrough the crowd. People go flying in all sorts of directions, hitting signs and rolling on the concrete. Groceries and briefcases skid on the floors, followed by the people who held them.

Kaneki had manages to pull Hinami back just in time, before the contents of the now crashed car fly into the young ghoul.

Glass and metal spiral into the pavement, yet surprisingly, everyone walks away with minor injuries. Almost everyone, at least.

As the ambulance flies to the scene, and as the police race to investigate the drunken driver, screams of horror and despair tear through the crowd suddenly.

“Someone's under the car!”

“He's not moving!”

“He's bleeding everywhere, where's the ambulance?!”

 

Hinami can sense the sense of urgency around the crowd, and the tension that befalls both ghouls only thickens as the paramedics make their way to the wreckage. “Onii-chan, should we go see who it is?”  
Himami's grip on Kaneki's arm tightens as she asks the question, and part of him thinks that it would be rude to go see a man wedged under a car, while the other part tingles with a foreboding feeling.

“Yeah, I gue-”  
Except, he doesn't have to move, now. No one does. The paramedics drag the limp body from under the wreckage, and at the sight of the blond hair stained with blood, and the broken head phones broken on the pavement, and the writhing body being loaded onto the stretcher, the entire square pauses for just a moment.

And for Kaneki, it seems as if the entire world has gone silent.

 

He runs forward, unaware of the people screaming behind him in his ear, unaware of Hinami tripping behind him, just to keep up with him. His hearts beating faster than it ever has, and that means a lot, because Kaneki's been through a lot. But nothings unsettled him more than this.

The moment is so surreal.

“H-Hide!” The name is forced out of his mouth, as he effortlessly breaks through the line of police, and falls to his knees, inches away from the stretcher.

_He's not moving! He's not breathing! His bones are broken, they're twisted and cracked! There are cuts all around him, scrapes and..._

Kaneki races to calm his mind, and in the process, snap at the medics who're taking so long to rejuvenate his friend. 

“Poor kid, his friend is already dead,” he hears one of them whisper to the other, and with a “hmph” he agrees. 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The next days are spent in the hospital, breathing and living off of the sterile air. It feels like they've gassed the place with hand sanitizer and bleach, and for a slight moment, Kaneki remembers his own long, lonely hours in the hospital. 

The only difference was that they were certain that he would live. 

The doctors inform Kanenki that it's not the scars, or the broken bones are the excessive bleeding that's attributing to the blond's comatose state. 

No, it's a tiny bruise on his head that he gained when the car slammed him into the pavement. It's so tiny, so...so harmless. 

Kaneki can see it, just below his bangs. 

 

Black finger nails wrap around Hide's thinning digits. Kaneki squeezes his hands in hopes that Hide will squeeze back. 

“He's here, but not _here,”_ say his doctors too many times, “We're keeping him on life support.”  
Kaneki doesn't respond, he only lays his head on the bed, his grasp around Hide's fingers unyielding. 

 

To lose Hide would leave Kaneki with no purpose in his life. His weakest, yet closest friend, he did everything to protect, and neglected him in the process. And while looking at the clouds of fog appear in his oxygen mask as he breaths, and the paleness of his now clammy skin in contrast with the purple bruise atop of his head, Kaneki regrets the time he spent with the ghouls, and regrets the time he didn't spend with Hide. 

 

He's said sorry so many times that he believes he's gone mute. He tries not to speak unless he's saying sorry, because he doesn't know what else to say. The staff has informed Kaneki that Hide's family will be visiting for the first and last time. They'll be taking their son off of life support. 

Kaneki can't say sorry enough. 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, hope you enjoy it!

Kaneki's never thought of tearing innocent humans limb from bloody limb until now. He's never felt a pain so hot, that it' s positively boiling underneath his pale skin, and he thinks for just a second, that he must have turned red from all the hot blood hissing just beneath his dermis.

 

Yet his automatic nodding to questions he doesn't at all agree with (though he wonders to himself, if shaking his head would make a difference), and his vacant expression betray his raging emotions.

 

Shadows stand gathered around the large bed, and though they’re actual people, Kaneki doesn’t see them as such. Their murky shade mirrors the darkness of their souls.

 

Kaneki knew that Hide's family never really cared for him, but to so quickly dismiss his life like this? To sign the papers, to condemn him to death. It sickened Kaneki more than his own screwed up situation. He wanted to voice his dismay anyway he could, but found his methods to be quite dramatic and too exposing for the situation.

 

Should he scream his heart out, and shout until his voice dries up into a crisp? Should he claw at his eyes until they were nothing but mere water in vacant sockets?

 

If they could not read the dismay on his face, as it was now, what on earth could he do to get them to listen? Nothing, nothing that wouldn’t involve hurting them.

 

 

The next few moments find Kaneki's hands wrapped firmly around Hide's pale fingers, and everyone in the room holds their breaths, as Hide prepares to take his final breath. Kaneki wants to apologize again and again, but figures his words are worthless now.

 

Plugs are pulled with a painful “click”, buttons are pressed on bulky machines, switches are flipped on and off, and Kaneki finds himself squeezing his eyes shut, as if he is the one on death row, as if he's the one whose being forcefully put to death.

 

His grip on the pale fingers tighten, tighten to the point where he's sure he's cut off most of Hide's circulation, and even broken a few important bones. But no one cares. Hide is already dead to them.

 

 

There's a hitched breath as Hide's taken off the machine. A cough and a strangle for life, and by now, Kaneki's tears have already fallen on the face of the body below, as he listens to his friend's struggle to breath.

 

The fingers in Kaneki's strong grasp twitch feebly, as if to beg the ghoul to let them go. Kaneki's eyes shoot open as he looks below him and is met with Hide's hazy gaze.

 

There's a shuffle around the room. Hands around Kaneki's chest pulling him away, a large plastic mask being forcefully thrown on Hide's face, screams and shouts, eating away at the endless doubt. The room is being cleared, the doctor flails his arm, and calls for every one to leave except the medical team.

 

Kaneki allows himself to be pulled out of the now active room, and a wry smile crawls on to his face.

 

“He made it,” Kaneki whispers to himself, as his back hits the hallway wall, and his forms crumples to the ground, “ he made it!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry for the short chapter, and the long wait! I hope you enjoy it. Have a wonderful week, and God bless!

**Author's Note:**

> Will be continued in the next chapter! Hope you liked it! Have a wonderful week and God bless!


End file.
